Do you have a person around or far away from you who spoils your mood the moment you see them, hear them or even when someone talks about them?
You are pretty convinced that you hate this person to the death. And you can’t just stand this person without losing your mind.
What if I told hating someone or even disliking someone is pointless & stupid.
Don’t believe me? Stay with me till the end of this article and I am sure I’ll make some sense.
Table of Contents
Why You Should Stop Hating People
1. It’s Affecting You
Hating someone affects you more than the person you hate.Just observe yourself whenever you feel those feelings of anger, hurt, frustrations when you look at their face or hear their voice or even name.
Doesn’t it ruin your day?
You suddenly feel lost and find hard to do the things which you were doing before developing those feelings of hate inside you.
I’m pretty sure you go through this. Then you keep wondering what went wrong and how a good day suddenly turned into a bad one.
So who is getting affected here?
It’s YOU!
2. You’re Giving Away Control Of You
Not just you are ruining your mood, schedule or even a whole day when you hate someone but you also lose control from yourself.
You actively give the control of your mind, emotions and your daily activities to a person whom you disliked the most.
How stupid is that?
But being that state of anger and hate, most of us don’t realise that we are letting someone else take the control of us.
And the funniest thing is that person you hate might not even have slightest idea that he or she is having such a strong control over your emotions.
It’s you who is actually giving away your well being to someone you hate a lot.
3. You Are Wasting Time
We all have a limited amount of time on this planet. And wasting it on hating some person, a celebrity, a religion, a country or any thing is not something a smart person would do.
Let’s talk about hate spreading on social media.
Everyone is trying to be right about everything. All of us (Yes, including you) have chosen a side, an opinion, a belief we think which is right.
And the problem is that we strongly believe that we are 100% right.
No, not everyone is that blind to their own beliefs. But the people who are, are highly engaged in daily fights in various social media platforms.
Every other day people are fighting with strangers on social media in trying to prove they are right. How time consuming is this?
Is this how people want to spend their valuable time fighting with people and ending up with restlessness?
How To Stop Hating Someone
1. Accept You Can’t Change Someone
Okay, let’s say that the person you hate actually is a bad person. Maybe he or she does have some serious flaws.
But does you hating them change at least a single thing about them?
Most of the time it doesn’t. You can never change a person in any way. And that too with hate? That’s never gonna happen.
So the first thing which you need to accept is that you can not change the person you hate. Whether it’s their bad behavior, habits or things which they did to you. You must accept the person as it is and let them be.
Otherwise you know how hating that person is going to affect your life.
2. Self Reflect / Talk To Yourself
Take a short break from thinking about this person and think about you. Are you perfect? Do you have flaws? Think about it all and be honest with yourself.
If you are imperfect and living with flaws then why can’t this person?
Now, I want you to ask these 3 questions to yourself :
Do I want to let this person control my life?
Do I want to give a right to this person to change my mental state?
Is this person even worth it?
Next time you feel these feelings of hate and anger inside, ask these questions to yourself. And you will have the right answer if you are honest with yourself.
Also read: Spend Time With Yourself
3. Ignore Them
Still you can’t stop yourself from disliking someone then just start ignoring them. They aren’t worth your attention, time or thoughts.
Try to know and understand what is about them which triggers your emotions. Every time you feel that feeling of anger within, go to its root deep inside you.
That’s how you’ll know what it is which just can’t stop you from hating someone. Then you can actively avoid yourself from going in that same direction or situations in future.
Get busy in yourself than others. Because that’s the only person whom you can control. Be with people whom you admire and spend time with them. But also don’t let the people you dislike control you in any way. Be it physically or mentally.
Final Word
To me, hating someone is just pointless. It is like slicing your own throat and blaming the knife (How did I think of this?).
Disliking someone or some thing is fine. But letting that thing take control of your mind is a very dangerous thing that most people do.
Anyway, I hope some of you after reading this article will actually start questioning themselves and stop giving control of your life to other people or a subject whom you hate.
Originally posted on 27th July 2020
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March 21, 2021 at 12:03 pm
Talking to yourself works. I dislike some actions of a person but I do not hate them.
The point you aroused is so important, hating or cursing someone gives you nothing. It increases your trouble. Some people really don’t deserve our attention. I belive in spreading joy and happiness.😊❤️🤭💫🌟🎉👌
March 29, 2021 at 10:25 am
I know right, why to give our precious time to someone who we dislike 😅
Thank you for sharing your thoughts❤️❤️
March 21, 2021 at 2:20 pm
So true! I’d like to think I’m becoming an expert in ignoring the source of my annoyance. On time they don’t shifting my focus to more worthwhile things like art or nature is almost always effective.
March 29, 2021 at 10:29 am
Wow, that’s so good to know!!!! Sounds like you’ve figured out the perfect way to tackle this❤️
March 21, 2021 at 8:02 pm
There’s a lot to learn and rectify our mistakes from this article👌
March 29, 2021 at 10:29 am
Thank you so much❤️❤️
March 21, 2021 at 11:59 pm
I agree to each and every points mentioned above especially the feeling lost part ❤❤❤ its so true , its like my complete day gets ruined and I generally dislike person’s certain behavior, my best bet is I cut off them (at least try to) from my life completely ….
March 29, 2021 at 10:30 am
Exactly, I’ve been there too. But then it feels to stupid to ruin whole day for such people🤷
March 22, 2021 at 3:20 am
I don’t think I can hate someone. I just don’t like some of their actions or behavior. Cause no matter how much I dislike them, I still have some tolerances (with limitation). I mean if they don’t confront or mess up with me, I’ll ignore. But, if they try to “set the war”, I’ll give them some “lessons”. Well, sometimes, they just want to test our patience..
March 29, 2021 at 10:32 am
Hell yeah😠
Sometimes you gotta show that side of yours as well💯
And it’s so good to hear from you again, it’s been so long😲
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April 29, 2024 at 12:57 am
Thank you. I’m in such a situation have a neighbor who dnt talk to or greet. It’s just something in her I dnt like.she was controlling my mindset..but after reading this more positive mind..