We all are broken, aren’t we?
You can be broken for many reasons, very complicated ones. A Major loss, a heartbreak, being abused or bullied and many more. You already know most of them. But today, we are going to talk about Healing emotionally from all of these.
One of the most peaceful feelings you’ll ever get is when you see yourself healing from something that shattered you. Worse the pain better is the relief. But this healing doesn’t happen quickly. It takes time, patience and belief.
In this article, we are going to talk about the signs you’ll see when you are healing emotionally. And if you’re lagging in the process of healing, these signs will help you get back on the right track.
So, let’s begin.
You’ll stop blaming others because you know it’s not going to change the things from past our how you currently feel.
Instead, blaming someone or complaining will drain you. You’ll end up overthinking every thing about someone which has hurt you badly and it will actually increase your pain. Because it will remind of all the negative experiences, even the ones you had already forgotten.
And once you’re on the right path of healing, you’ll soon start to realize that you no longer blame that person, or anyone else in your life.
You start taking responsibility for your life, your pain, your suffering and your own mistakes. You don’t waste time in making someone realize their mistakes.
Because you accept that at some point it has always been you who put yourself in that situation. No matter what kind of hurt you had to go through. No other person can force you into something.
You finally understand, blaming others can’t change what they did or going to do with you.
Also read : Stop Playing Blame Game | Why and How?
The next thing you do after stopping blaming is forgiving the people who are responsible for hurting you.
This is a very brave step but when you do it, it will be the most peaceful feeling. You can’t force yourself to forgive someone, you’ll just do it when you stop being the victim and look at things rationally.
Hate is as strong as love, actually I think it’s more powerful.
Hating someone can cause more harm to yourself than the person you hate. It will destroy your mental peace, change the way you look at other people and your behavior will get worse.
So, if you’re hurting right now & hating someone for the same, stop for a while. Take a step back & look how it is affecting your own life. You’ll find yourself in a crazy mess.
And if you want to get out of it, you’ll need to stop hating others. Forgive people, don’t waste your time in trying to correct others. If they want to change, they will. It’s their life.
You also forgive yourself for your own mistakes. Blaming yourself can be even more deadly. Instead of blaming, you start to learn from your mistakes, know your patterns & triggers.
And this is what actually is self improvement where you first know yourself, correct yourself and keep doing it all over again.
You will stop beating yourself for the stupid mistakes you made years ago. All those things which you didn’t do right or messed up will not give you nightmares anymore.
When we mess up at something and realise that it was our mistake, our first reaction is to blame ourselves. But at some point in your life you’ll realise, no amount of self blaming can take you back in time & erase your mistakes.
When you start healing, you start to realise where to invest your time & energy. You realise that, Life is too short to waste your time in the past. And overthinking about past mistakes or your flaws will not improve anything. It will only waste your time and energy.
So, you accept that you & people around you are flawed and that’s okay.
This is one of my favourite signs. I remember the first I felt this when I started writing. Suddenly I had this feeling that Everything happens for a reason. And it felt so good.
It was like connecting dots of those negative experiences from my life to form something meaningful.
And this has become my thing now. Whenever things don’t go the way I thought, I always have faith that it is happening for a reason. It is going to take me to a much better place than I thought before.
You’ll notice this type of attitude in many people who have actually moved on from the worst past & created the best life out of it.
Take a look at successful people from any field, you’ll notice that they are always grateful for the things which gave them pain. You never see them blaming others or themselves for anything negative they’ve faced in life.
This one is a very strong sign that you’re on the path of healing.
Yes, you stop running away from what has hurt you in the past. This can be certain people, relationships, situations, etc.
Because now you have learned that there’s no escape out of suffering. No one can just avoid it by running away. At some point in your life you must need to do those scary stuff and you’ll have no other choice.
I’ll call it the Escaping mechanism. Something which we develop after experiencing exactly the opposite than we first thought of.
Once something breaks you, you avoid going back to something that looks similar to it. You fear that it will again break and hurt you even worse than the first time.
So, you run away. But how long can you run?
The only way out of suffering is through it.
This is my most favourite feeling. There just comes a moment, a very ordinary one but it makes you feel so happy, satisfied and peaceful.
You don’t even try to know why, because it just has no reason. You are just happy for no reason at all and it feels the best. Like a feeling which most of us felt in our childhood. When you don’t need much reason to be happy or to laugh. You always found joy in little things.
That’s what you’ll feel like when you’re finally healing from something which made you lose your true-self.
You start experiencing joy even in the most random things. Like looking at the moon on dark night, watching your hair swing with the air or just doing nothing.
You’ll feel happy for no reason.
You will stop trying to resist the change. You won’t mind people changing. Because now you understand the fact that Change is the only constant and you can’t do anything about it. So you accept it as it is.
When people around you change their behavior, break the promises they once made, treat you badly, you don’t go & lash at them. You know that no matter how hard you try, you can’t change them. And trying it is only going to exhaust you.
You understand the way people behave with you has hardly to do with you, it’s mostly about themselves.
So, when someone becomes impatient you give them your patience, when someone treats you with anger you reply with kindness and when someone leaves you wish them the best.
Also read : Why Do People Change – 3 Ways To Deal With It
There can be many more signs of emotional healing that different people experience. All of the above are the ones I’ve experienced in the last two years.
I’m not sure if I’m completely healed from everything. But I know that I have learnt to handle complicated situations and not make the same mistakes from my past.
Though, there come moments when you think you’ve healed and something just breaks you apart all over again. But then, you also know how to not let yourself drown in the misery.
I hope you guys could relate to the signs I’ve mentioned and I hope you see more such signs very soon.
Also, let me know what’s the best sign of healing you’ve felt? Mine is #4.
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