Sometimes you miss the memories not the person – Source: Internet

You will come across the quote on social media almost everyday with different backgrounds/aesthetics/colors.

I think I did agree with this quote for some time but now I don’t.

Do You Miss The Person Or The Memories?

I don’t think it’s the memories of that person/relationship or the person you miss. What you miss is ‘yourself’ when you had them in your life

You miss that version of yourself when you two were sharing those beautiful, intimate and cosy moments with each other.

Once that bond starts to weaken & starts leading towards its death, ‘you’ start to change. Your behavior with them changes, you no longer can do or talk about things which you used to. You sometimes give it a try and wait to see if things can go back to what they used to be.

But you fail.

So, you become a totally new person with them. Someone you aren’t familiar with much. You miss being that person who was not so awkward with this person, who could make jokes out of anything & have conversations about all the serious and silly topics.

When you are truly in love with someone or in the stages of falling into love, you look at your own life with a different perspective. There’s a sudden spark & excitement in everything you do. You start enjoying doing things even which doesn’t involve that person.

Then suddenly some day things change, maybe the person does too. You two say cliche lines that people say while parting ways. And now you are left on your own.

Well, it’s not that you can’t or haven’t been on your own before. But this time it’s different as being alone after a significant amount of time of having someone else along your side is different.

And then the missing part starts. Everyday reminds you something new from the old memories & then you come across this quote. Is it the person or the memories?

What’s so special about this person? I can meet anyone, in fact someone better than the person, then how can I miss this person? And memories, well they can be created again, maybe even more beautiful/intimate/wholesome than the ones from the past.

So you don’t really miss any of these two. You miss being you.

In life, it happens that you meet someone & they bring out a version of you that you have never seen. You love being that person with them and with everyone else. There’s a change in the way you look at your life, your future and having someone in your life gives a sense of a new purpose/meaning.

But when you lose this someone, you miss that you as well. You lose that hope. You had just started loving that hopeful version of yourself and it just vanishes. More than the person, you lose yourself.

But think about it, do you really need someone else to be you?

You don’t really need the people you’ve lost or the ones you gonna meet in future to discover this part of you. You can be the hopeful, cheerful, funny, inspired, anything & everything on your own & for yourself.

So, out the two options that we have in the title of this post, I choose none of the above.

What do you think, is it the person or the memories that you miss? This is just my opinion, it can possibly be wrong and may not resonate with everyone.

Also, let me know if someone else has shared similar thought on this topic, I couldn’t find it over the internet.


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13 thoughts to “Do You Miss The Person Or The Memories?

  • Zoewiezoe

    Yes. So much yes.
    I’m still, after 5 months, missing the me that I feel like I lost. But I can’t seem to get up the courage to go looking either…

    Reply
    • Accidental Blogger

      Hang in for some more time, we all been there. I’m sure that you will find yourself again ❤️🌻

      Reply
  • Pavithra

    You have said it truly!! We really miss ourselves when we had them in our! The happy us, and not the memory because it easily fades away!

    Reply
    • Pavithra

      *In our life!

      Reply
    • Accidental Blogger

      Yeah! We do miss the memories but they fade away with time & we move on with our lives.

      But the lost part of ourselves..

      Reply
  • christin

    Very well said, it was a great read

    Reply
  • Sohanpreet Kaur

    well, that’s a complicated topic. But yes! as you said memories can be made again, so we miss a part of ourselves that come to light with that specific person..
    but I can’t say surely…what we miss🤔 It’s complicated..

    Reply
    • Accidental Blogger

      Yes! We move on from memories eventually but if we lose ourselves then it’s quite hard to get back.

      Hehe Yes, it’s complicated

      Reply
  • Jessi

    I totally relate to this on a personal level! I changed everything I wanted to be with my ex husband. A lot of life lessons there. Wonderfully written. Thanks so much for sharing!

    Reply
    • Accidental Blogger

      Thank you so much Jessi, so glad to you could relate & find this helpful❤️❤️❤️

      Reply
  • Tiffany Garrett

    For me personally it’s the memories and not the person that I miss.

    Once upon a time we were inseperable and loved it. We loved and longed for each other. Chemistry even undeniable by onlookers of LOVE. So unexpectedly from her that that Love would be taken for granted. She fought for her relationship for years trying to mend the distrust and appreciation for one another. She even changed her replies and behavior. Unbeknownst to her she lost herself trying to explore the deeper portions of him. Years passed and she knew neither her or the relationship had gotten any better but stronger were her emotions of not wanting to walk without him. The thought of separation hurt her heart. She eventually gains strength after years of abuse whole enduring. STILL loving, wanting, missing and longing for him.. Memories years of beautiful memories and abuse tactics that followed. She no longer trusted him..but the memories kept her up at night. This emotional rollercoaster called her relationship no longer was attractive even to her.

    As much as she misses him/the person she had to walk on accepting they were past a mending..She didn’t want to be blamed and abused any longer..She could miss him all she wanted and it hurt sometimes

    But her thoughts alone were safer than turning back.

    I encourage us to look at US and go deeper in whether it’s truly The Person or The Memories we miss… your life could be dependent on it…

    Please check out my blog page as well for more Real Love Stories and Inspiration

    poeticjustice16.wordpress.com

    Thank you

    Reply

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