To My Ex,
Where do I start ?
There are so many things which were left unsaid.
There are so many feelings which remained unexpressed.
Yes ,I have always been bad at expressing myself.
And you know it too.
It’s been a long time since we talked.
I hope you’re happy .
I hope you’re doing something which you always wanted to.
Reason behind writing this to you is to express what I never did.
To apologize you for doing a lot of mistakes & hurting you.
Sorry ! I’ve hurt you. I’ve made you cry. I gave you pain.
I accept my every mistake.
You said ,I hurt you intentionally. I did things to make you feel insecure. And I left you alone intentionally.
Seriously? Someone who has been with you from long 3 years through thick & thin ,Who has been there with you at your worst , someone who always wanted you to get better will hurt you intentionally ?
No ,I never tried to make you feel insecure. I always tried to express how much you meant to me. I always chose my words & my actions wisely just to make sure it doesn’t hurt you.
But they still did. And I’m sorry for that.
No , I didn’t leave you alone. I didn’t get bore when we used have late night calls. No matter how tired I was still I tried my best stay up with you. I’m sorry ,I failed.
I knew you couldn’t sleep. I knew about your nightmares but I’m sorry that I couldn’t be there with you.
You never knew how hard I cried whenever I hurt you.
I was always confused. Always unsure about our future. I accept that.
As a 20 year old guy who just failed in his college it was hard to figure out what I needed to do. It was hard to decide where I need to focus more.
More importantly it was hard for me to choose between Family & Love.
I was scared to promise you a future.I was scared to hurt you. I’ve seen you at your worst & I was scared to even imagine you going through that again.
As a failure ,I wanted to achieve a lot. I wanted to work hard on lot of things where I was weak.
But I was not strong enough to handle all of these things.
I started to change. My behavior changed. I became more silent. I started hurting you more.
I still remember when I said “No matter how my behaviour is changing ,I still love you the same way. And I need some time”.
I’m writing you this to accept all of my mistakes & to apologise you for everything.
I’m sorry for everything.
I’ve nothing to say against you. All I want to say is all the best for your future. May you achieve Happiness, Peace & Prosperity in your life.
I still miss the old us ,Crazy bff.
I still miss the friendship we had.
But it’s okay.
I’m doing good too.
There might be few more things remaining to say but I guess it’s enough for now.
Talk to you soon.
If you ever come across this letter , do not forget to reply 😉
Hello , If there’s anyone who wants to talk about anything , who wants someone to talk their heart out can contact me .I’ll be happy to talk with you about anything .
You can contact me here.
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